Mad Lulu

OK. So the appliances are fixed, for the time being - but they could turn on us again at any moment. I don't get it! It's not like I overwork them or anything......especially the oven.

This post was supposed to be about Woodstock. But that's so last.....Sunday.

And then it was supposed to be about the two great awards that I got - one from Diane and one from Green-Eyed Momster. Diane's award is a Super Comments Award, and GEM's award is Your Blog Rocks my Face Off!. And I so appreciate these awards, but as I've said before, I'm still technically challenged - although I'm getting better! - and do you think I can get the awards onto my blog? Oh hell no. Or heck no, if you're still observing your "I'm going to clean up my language" New Year's resolution. Me, I'm living in a 'resolution-free' zone.

But as usual, I digress.

This post is about a cool hipster site on AMC TV to MadMen your deck self. If you're a fan of the show, you'll like this. And even if you're not, it will waste a few minutes while you're waiting for the next act on AGT.

Here's me, doing a Mad Lulu presentation for work this week. Except I don't do advertising for the Huge. Or show pictures of women in underwear. Although that would make the staff meetings soooo much more interesting - as it is, the men always complain when we want to talk about anything not work-related. It's all "Mathity-math graph ical..mumble blah results. ...yadda...plan....compile the profiteese pipeline havarti cheese." And we just want to talk shoes, really.

It's all about the shoes. And the havarti cheese, sometimes.

Going back to school.....

I can't believe that it's time for school to start! Of course, we have year-round schools here, so the traditional start of the school year is very complex around my neighborhood. Still, everyone seems to be starting next week - sheesh! When I was growing up, we didn't start until Labor Day and although I complained with the best of them, I was always ready to go back.

New books, new school clothes, new boyfriends, football season, fall colors......what's not to love?

But still....

Memorial Day - and my LuluandmyfriendTeri trip was just yesterday....wasn't it? And what happened to Independence Day? I haven't gotten into bikini shape....ok, two-piece bathing suit sh-....ummmmm.....swimsuit..

Aw hell.

I've got no shape. What happened to all those spring workouts that were going to give me the taut arms? (actually, I know - I stopped at my neighbor's house Sunday and apparently she got all the workouts in - shoot. And I like her, so I can't hate on her because she's got great arms, she's all nice and what have you.....siggghhhh. Where was I? Oh yeah....time getting away from me. HElloo....irony knocking....ANYWAY!)

The real point of my post?

Going back to school time makes me think about all the angsty, greasy, twitchedy, hormoney high school years. I'm feeling your pain, parents of teenagers!!!

But here's my confession. I liked my kids' teenager years. I really enjoy the teenagers in the neighborhood - and NOT in a creepy way, shut up. I like to talk to them and find out what's new in their world, the latest texting stats, who's zooming who, and counting how many times someone can use the word 'like' in one sentence - because it's like, you know, I was really like so, it was like really cool when we talked about music and like I was like you know so like I was all clappy and stuff.

Clappy. I 'best-practiced' that word from Miss Y. Corporate geeks - you know what that means!

So I'm off to the Huge tomorrow - see you Thursday!

Oh and btdubs - although I took the AGT video section away, it doesn't mean that you're absolved from watching the show - there will like, be a quiz, like...sometime. Whatever. Peace out.

Hey B's - I'm back!

Yoiks.....it was a really really looooong week at the Huge HQ.  Mix a group of corporate employees with non-U.S. CEOs and CFOs and C-Schmoes with a slurp of mandatory training issues seasoned with cafeteria food, surrounded by early wake-up calls and late night dinners....it was NOT the beach.

And I didn't have the energy to get online at midnight and fight the IT barbed wires to throw some comments over the firewall....so I slacked.  Yes, Slacker be my name.

Or would it be Bloglacker?

Whatever.

And so much went on while I was gone!  It's like that scene in 'Pretty Woman'  when Kit is trying to tell Vivian why it took her so long to get over to the Beverly Hills Wiltshire hotel - you know, "Skinny Marie got cut up and we had to go see her in the hospital, and Jimmy got in a fight and someone tried to work my star on the Walk of Fame...."

Only in the blog world, You Mama won a cool giveaway, but also gave away some birth control gum, and AmyKate poked a hole in the pool but the garden's coming along, and Joanna's been hanging out with her BFF and omg - Libby's adopted a baby girl!!

So at least - they kept the blog world spinning.

I came home and some of MY BFFs were here, on their way further down the coast for a beach vacation next week.  MyfriendsJenGuyBeazerLou - yeah.  They rock.  The time together was short but sweet - have fun myfriends!

And last....to Facebook and Twitter or not to....to horribly misquote Shakespeare.  That is the question.  Discuss amongst the comments.

Of course, please check out Grandma Lee!

Happy Summer Vacation!

....to everyone else.  whine whine even though I already had my thelmaandlouise trip with myfriendTeri and a week with wonder grandson....whine whine woe is me.

There's something about Independence Day that makes me want to be back in school again just so that I can be out of school for summer vacation.

Unfortunately, I have to travel all week for work, so I have to leave later today on a flight on a holiday weekend.  again with the whining.  

Oh well.  My good friends will be here at the end of the week for a short visit and I will wring every bit o' fun and goodness from them.

And I have AGT to look forward to, and that should help me through the week as well.  Please note this week's video - this girl's voice is incredible.  I defy you not to get a little goosebumply.

So also see the new more More MORE link on the roll over there to the right - hopefully it will spark some watercooler talk for you this week.  It concerns an article titled Women Aren’t Getting Their Fair Share of the Stimulus Package by Dr. Susan Love.  

Have a great week y'all!  Hopefully I can get to everyone's blog and post up a bit - depends on the connectivity in the hotel....

Vacation is OOOooover.....

Whine.  Whine.  winewine.  Whine.

Vacation roadtrip is over, I've said tearful goodbyes to MFT, and it's back to work tomorrow.

Big, fat heavy siiiiigggghhhhhh.  Woe is me, poor me, waa waaa waaaaa - HAVING to go back to work, when many many people would be happy to have a job to whine about in a blog post.

But it just feels like the last night of Christmas break.  Not the last night of summer vacation, because I was always ready to go to school in the fall (new clothes, new boyfriend, football season etc) but the night before Christmas break is over always had the most awful icky feeling.

However - the day is sunny, I'm with my honey, and my blog friends are funny.  Also, we have a baseball game to attend (yum, hot dogs and beer) and I think I hear the ice cream truck outside!

PS.  I know that I promised lots of blog posts and pictures of MFT and I, but I find that I'm reluctant to put it all out there for public viewing.  Our funny moments and our picture moments and our really really great friend moments - there's a reason that we didn't make this an all-friend trip, and it was so we didn't have to care about anyone else except what we wanted to do and drink and eat and discuss and view.  The pictures are funny too.  But I just don't want to share.....I'm sorry!

Here are some pictures of the scenery along the way as a consolation prize....  

And I realize that this is why I'll never reach super-blogger status and will always need to be very creative in my writing to keep  my fives and tens interested....but I just can't divulge all the Lulu secrets.  Maybe someday, when I'm not working at the Huge....

Thanks for hanging with me anyway.  I hope.

Budgeting Time and Money

Dear Fives and Tens,

That's all I've done this week - budgeted time, money, resources.  Isn't that all we really do anyway?  When was the last time that you truly did nothing......and twittering doesn't count.  Nor does blogging. :)

It's budget time at the Huge, and I swear that I'm ready to take the CPA exam because all I've done this week is crunch numbers on spreadsheets, and that's not really my job description.  And it's all about getting out the Ouija board and guessing who and what and which I'm going to need for next year, and then defending keeping the Who's who live in Huge McNormous Lulu Department Whoville.  It really is very Seussian.  Mostly the Grinch part.

And then I need to find time to clean and get ready for the not-begone relatives, to arrive sometime during the afternoon tomorrow, while I'm getting grilled by the Huge CFO - because nothing says fun like defending keeping your employees and the one pen that you have everyone pass around to save money- on a Friday afternoon.  Before the relatives arrive.  Who will probably - when asked what their plans are for the weekend - answer very cheerfully, "We don't care - just show us the local attractions!"

So of course, Mr. Lulu and I have already had the requisite pre-not-begone relative argument over - toilet bowl cleaner.  I guess that was the 'budgeting for resources' part of the post.

Please don't ask.  Just feel free to make up funny stories and post them in the comments to cheer me up, while I'm trying to find time to watch just one episode of something reality tv.ish.

But first - off to fire up the humidifier.

Weather is here - wish you were beautiful!

Hugs,

Lu

Dancing with the Starfish

So dinner for my work peeps was really great, actually.  We laughed and had some good food and a fair amount of adult bevvies - although not too many, everyone was safe to drive - and it was good!  

I am really lucky to be surrounded by a fabulous team of people who work hard AND smart, and they make a difference in the lives of everyone at work while consistently making me look good.  I tell them so all the time, and try to give them credit wherever I can, especially outside of my department.

So no drama or puking or stolen silverware - just fun and teasing and food and drink.

Plus - we had a dance contest during our staff meeting.  Ok - during a break in our staff meeting, in the event that anyone from the Huge is reading this post. 

Y'all, you haven't lived until you've seen my dance team rock a gangsta hiphop version of the Chicken Dance - or The Angry Chicken, as it came to be known.  Deckster sweet!  All the judges were laughing so hard they simultaneously blew cafeteria coffee out their noses.

Perfect score, three tens - take that, Len Goodman!

Work karma, yo - pay it forward.

Lulu's Baaaaack!!!

hi hi Hi Hi HI HI HIHIHIHIHIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!

Hellooooooooo......

I'm back, all you deckster hippy blogsters and twitters :)!

After utilizing every current form of transportation known to mankind - except for a rickshaw and a glider - I'm home after 8 days of living out of a suitcase.

Planes, rental cars, trains, subways, taxis, a ferry, a bus and my own legs - walking ACROSS THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE no less - all moved me about in various cities and states and locations.  I worked, I met, I conferenced, I ate, I drank adult bevvies, I had addies, I shopped, I walked and rode and drove and flew.

But no blogging.  I could see all y'all, but couldn't comment or post to my own blog - sooooo very frustrating!  The IT department at Huge McNormous is gooood.  And I'm not complaining really - I'm glad that they're protecting me from viruses and evil spammers and the potential that someone will steal my computer and download porn (really.  that's one of their biggest fears.)  - it's just that I feel really far behind, and need to get caught up out there in cyberspace.

Unfortunately, I won't have a lot of time this week, as I'm hosting my entire staff at my home tomorrow night for a department dinner so I'm cleaning and polishing and dusting.  At least all the places that someone is likely to see......my husband thinks I should just clean the kitchen and the bathroom because those are the only places that people hang out during dinner.  But I'LL know that it's dusty in the corners of the upstairs bedroom and it will bug me.

Also, in-laws coming at the end of the week for a week - cleaning needs ramped up even more.

But I'm back!  I'm coming to comment on your blogs!  Please give me a shout-out to let me know that you're still with me!!!

The.Longest.Winter.Ever

Two posts for me in one day is a bit unusual.  But I've been reading some of my regulars on the blogroll, and it just seems like this is the longest winter we've all experienced in many many years.  And everyone is trying not to complain, and to be appreciative for what we have, and hopeful for the future and blah blah blah.  

But no one seems to be in a good place.  Seriously - no one seems to be happy or even just content.

Is it the weather?  The dismal economy?  The fear that seems to be hanging over all, the fear of losing what we have that keeps us from taking risks?  The continued media harping on the nonexistent feud between Jennijohn and Brangelina?  Being happy for Kate Winslet while being over her at the same time?  The "can't look but can't look away from the car crash" that is the Octuplet Mom?

Ok, I'm being a bit facetious.  I know that people are genuinely down and depressed and a bit flat, and I certainly have my moments.  In fact, I don't talk about those moments - many of them at Huge McNormous - specifically because I'm a bit fearful and superstitious and careful. 

But to all of my blogger friends - and I think you all know who you are - I'm reading and I care about you and hope for the best for all y'all.  I might not always comment - although I intend to start doing so much more often - but I hear you.  Hang in....

It's Friday! And I got....

umm. Nothing.  Even less nothing than usual.  Zero. Zip.  It's rainy and cold and gray - I thought I'd given up that weather when I left Michigan - and I have to head to yet another  national meeting for the Huge McNorm tomorrow, then back to HQ until Wednesday.

Honestly, I just want to curl up with some pumpkin spice cake doughnuts until the end of something - time or season, I can't decide which - and read until my eyes fall out.

And then I want to spring into action, my new business plan for HM fully formed, with at least 30 new collage pieces actually finished (not just brewing in my head) and THIN.  

Yes, once again - if I were only thin again.  Everything would be better.  The Dow would go up as my waistline went down, the economy would be humming, and my black dog would be off to permanent doggy camp.

But at least I'm niiiiiiiiice.

Mmmmm.....doughnuts....oops.  Just a brief brain break.

I was reading a post by Gwen at Woman on the Verge about children noise - go ahead.  Read it and then come back.  I'll wait.  She's good.

(ticktockticktock)

You're back?  Ok - so as I was reading it, I was thinking that noisy children don't seem to be bothering me at the moment.....and then a noise from downstairs made me realize that I have my own noisy child - M, downstairs, watching tv.  He has this really REALLY annoying habit that I like to call Swirl, Slide and Crunch.  It involves a big pile of ice in a large plastic cup with just enough water/soda so that he can swirl the ice 4/5/8 times, throw back the cup and slide the whole icy mess back, snag an ice cube, slide the cubes back into the cup, and then crunch the ice really quickly and loudly.

Every 30 seconds.  SwirlswirlswirlSLIIIIIIIDEcrunchcrunchcrunch.  (obligatory caveat - love the man completely, would miss him and the noise if he were gone, shouldn't complain, good guy,  REALLY NICE blah blah)  swirlswirlswirlSLIIIIIIIIIIIIDEcrunchcrunchcrunch.

  Should hydration really be that dramatic?  

Happy weekend everyone!

Lobster Bacon Sliders

And bevvies.  Lobster bacon sliders and bevvies.  The sliders were so good, I couldn't mack on them fast enough.  Fresh lobster, some kind of saucey sauce, tomato, crispy bacon on a little round slider bun with a cool toothpicky thing in it.   Mmmm  mmmmmm.mmmmm..

That was the highlight of my trip to Huge HQ farther up the east coast a piece... LBS during a late dinner yesterday.  

So I'm back home tonight and have to ask - sans the LBS (see above) - is there anything better than peeling off tights and heels and putting on jammies where I don't have to suck it up or in?

Oh HELL no.

And I'm still myself, even though I had to do the performance appraisal thing, and the dialogue thing and the perpendicular rightsizing corporatey thing and say all the right things to the boss so I'll still get a decent bonus and maybe a raise thing.

So I can buy more shoes and LBS.  Of course, if I eat any more of them and drink more bevvies, I won't be able to fit into my LBD.  

Is there time for me to run for office and get someone to pay $150,000 for a new wardrobe so I can show off how little I know about government, the economy and foreign policy?

Just checking.

Why is it called Bluetooth?

...because apparently, it's named after Harald Bluetooth, an ancient king who unified warring tribes.  And that's what I did this week - I unified the needs of 950 salespeople at a national sales meeting.

Arguments between warring managers over awards for their people, disagreements with employees kept out of entering work sessions because they were 15 minutes late, discord between Huge McNormous IT employees and the hotel AV staff, disagreement between my feet and the pile of three-inch heeled shoes in my hotel closet, conflict between an inebriated employee and a stack of 30, 2-ft high vases containing circular dahlias - yup, I bluetoothed my way through the week, unifying them all - everyone went home alive and mostly happy.

And I'm happily home, where it's cooler than usual - making it feel like autumn at last.

I need punkins!!!

Shoes Never Make Me Look Fat

I.Love.Shoes.  I never have to suck in my stomach or clench my butt or wear Spanx to wear great shoes.  It is ever so much more satisfying to try on shoes, even when I've just been totally turned off by trying on clothes.  

I will say, that I'm liking the longer length tops currently in style.  So many Pringles and red wine bulges can be hidden under a decent top.

So I'm off to the sales meeting - wish me luck!  As we're cooped up in a convention-style hotel the entire week, I'm hoping that I emerge on Friday to find the Dow back up over 1000, Palin jokes abounding and that today's ND-UNC college football score has been overturned.

Ok, 1 out of 3 will do.

Best,

Lulu

Tin Can Savings

I need some inspiration!  I think about Etsy and my blog during odd moments at the Huge, and then I get home after 7:00 and think - I'm just too tired to gear up for a project that I'll have to put down in a few hours.

See, I think being basically lazy and tired is what has contributed to my love of crap TV.  It's just easier to look at all the great work everyone else is doing and think...I could see that better if I weren't yawning so loud.  So I'll go watch the big screen, curl up into the fetal position and feel my brain turn to sludge.

That, or growing up as a tail-end baby boomer with the TV as a babysitter.

So anyway, M has decided that all of the banks are going to fail, and we need to bury some cash in the backyard.  

Me:  So - what are you doing today?

M: I'm going to Costco...

Me: Oh, ok - we need bottled water, paper plates, check out the specials on-

M: No...for a safe.

Me: What?  We have four file cabinets!  We can keep the  passports and will in one of them - we have plenty of -

M: No, not for documents.  For keeping cash...

Me: What for?

M: You know...it's all over the web and MSNBC and CNN.  They say-

Me: The faceless nameless expert-on-everything They? 

M: Sarcasm makes your elevens* deeper.  Anyway - everyone knows that a bunch of banks are going to fail and how are we going to pay our bills?  We need to keep some cash on hand.  I'm going to take some money out of the savings and keep it in a save in the closet.

(Crickets)

Me:(shoulders shaking, trying to keep sensitive, feeling, Dr. Phil-face on)

M: Well, you'll be happy when you can't get into Paypal and I'll have to cover your Etsy debts! 

True that!

Needless to say, we now have our 2008 version of the backyard tin can in our house.

Etsy on!

Lulu

*elevens - for you youngsters out there, elevens are the wrinkles between your eyes from squinting in the sun for all your live

Bevvies and Addies

I'm back from the land down under....under Georgia.  Yes, I'm back from Disney and my business trip to a workshop/caucus/conference on Motivation.   I have some thoughts on motivation....motivate THIS as we say.

And of course, it's AGT results night.  Ohhhh....the little four-year-old just got voted off.

No offense - she's so so cute and bright.  But again, seriously - a Vegas act?  Nope. 

(As I type this, M is yelling up to me from downstairs, giving me his theories and spreadsheet analysis on which of the top five AGT acts is going to win and he's splitting the country into a red state/blue state format to pick the winner.)  Love that man.

So while I was at the workshop in Orlando, I was using technology as an illusion of work.  Yes, I was crackberrying during breaks, to try to keep up with all that is going on at Huge McNormous these days, and I received a message from another employee that went like this:

"Hey, didn't receive my invite to meeting X.  Please use my work addy instead of my home addy.  I have two addies, please use the right one."

Addy?  Addies?  

You just know that this guy wears loafers with no socks, pleated khakis and a double-breasted jacket with a crest pocket over a pink polo shirt with the collar popped.  And you have to count your fingers when you shake his hand.  And he points at you with both hands forming trigger fingers and makes a clicking noise with his tongue....And...well.  You get the picture.  

So there I am with some members of my management team at the conference and we spent some time in Epcot, which was hot and humid.   We stopped at various venues, trying to slake our thirst, and I showed them the email from Mr. Salesy guy with the addies.

Of course, then we all got addytudes and had to toast his email with adult bevvies.

That's motivation.

:) Lulu

Off to create - see you on Etsy!

Velveeta Night

Yippeeee!!

A third night of America's Got Talent, M is out of town, I'm just back in town and home after a partial week at McNormous HQ, and I'm back blogging.  Plus Amber put my Halloween Tin Pail on her blog - a big shout out to my color of dawn creations friend - (see her blog link in my faves).

How can you not love AGT?  I discuss it in depth with one of my employees at lunch every day --  OMG!  HOW could they put the little four-year-old girl through??  She's cute and she knows her songs - but really?  The prize is a headline show in Vegas for goodness sakes.....

Ok.....Nuttin but Strings...c'mon, c'mon..................................................YES!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shwew, as my niece would say.  

Anyway, this employee/colleague/friend - we talk about AGT, OCC (Orange County Chopper) Jon and Kate Plus Eight (another employee KNOWS them...luckEE), Amazing Race, Miami Ink, The Office...you name it, if it's on TV, we discuss it.  And we're not stoopid couch potatoes, it's just that - when you have to deal with corporate life, large-money decisions, employee and business decisions...it's nice to turn it off and not have to think while you're numbing your mind.

Plus it's safer to talk about tv than to discuss politics.

This is at least a decent end to a really bad week - I had to lay off two employees on Tuesday.   So I'm going to bury myself in etsy life this weekend to feel creative instead of destructive.

I know I'll never be able to quit work for my store - shoot, I might never make a sale! - but it does calgon me.

Be safe on this anniversary date, my remote friends...

Finally - Getting Started

Sha-whewwwww....as my niece used to say...I'm finally getting the blog off the ground.  I have started and stopped a few times already, trying to get this juuuust perfect.   Huh.  Yeah.  Still thinking that EVERYTHING I do has to be perfect or something bad will happen.

At least - that's what my black dog keeps telling me. 

And this ain't the black dog that's soooo friendly, as in the restaurant, or in the big calm black lab that saves somebody from drowning in the big lake.  No, my black dog is the voice inside my head that tells me I'm somehow never good /talented / pretty / smart / clever enough for ...someone.  Usually me.  Because really?  No one else is judging me as harshly as I'm judging myself.  

But more about the black dog later.  (I think most women have an internal black dog so hopefully some readers can relate).

So, this is all part of the plan to launch a blog and an Etsy site and a website and an eBay store and links to cool sites and favorite blogs.  For my second life as a successful, well-known multi-media artist.

Of course, to have a second life you have to have a first life, which I do - I work for Huge McNormous Corporation, as a Sr. Director of Corporate Stuff.   And most of the time I feel that I'm making a difference.   But looking into the future, I really want to do something that I love - to have that wonder of waking up in the morning anxious to get to work because it's fun, not because I have so many meetings to wade through, or issues to handle.

This will be my story and my journey as I try to create a business to enjoy in the future.