"" Lulu's Sandbar: How are you dooooin?
Welcome to my sand bar - trying to push past my boundaries and serve up humorous observations on life...

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

How are you dooooin?

This is what I'm most often asked, after someone says that they're sorry for my mom's death. And I don't know quite how to answer that. Some days I can barely put one foot in front of the other, and other days I'm ok. I just didn't know that grief could be so palpable, and so physical....

On the other hand, I have some not-so-immediate relatives starting to circle a bit, letting me or my siblings know how much they did for my mom, and how many times they invited her over.....riiiiiiiight. Because then it's oh so casually asked - "so what are you doing with her house and her things?"

Day-ummm. I should be writing about my mom and about our sibling pinkyswear - day 10 and still holding - and instead, I'm writing about relative crap. Relatively speaking.

Seriously folks? Go ask Brother McStonewall, the sibling just above me in age, and the executor of mom's estate. Go ahead - ask him what's going on with mom's estate. What's that? You're afraid of him?

So that's good.

6 comments:

R Montalban said...

Oh, my goodness - I am so very sorry to hear that. They will eventually get back under their stones from which they crawled out of but until then, just flex that pinky several times!

Joanna Jenkins said...

Oh yes, been there done that, kicked those crazies to the curb. Sorry you have to deal with that stuff Lulu. Hang in there.
xo jj

diane said...

Years from now, you will find yourself still picking up the phone to call her. It's something you never get over, and something that no one else understands. Like when you've been staring into space and your husband asks if you're o.k. and you answer "yes, I was just thinking about my mom".

Screw the relatives, btw.

said...

thank you all, for the comments and the understanding....

Amber D. Mcnabb said...

I would imagine how you're doooooin' is continuing life with a giant hole in your broken heart. But who actually says that right? My family had their hands out in the most maddening way when my Grammy passsed who by the way was burried in her sandals sporting her shiny toe ring that I got for her and also her princess tiarra that I handmade one weekend while she was recovering from cancer treatment with her eyebrows growing back like groucho marx. She made all the doctors look at her shiny toe ring even if they had to remove her sock from her cold tootsies. I prefer to dwell in those memories when someone askes to take home something rightfully belongs to Grammy's onliest granddaughter....aka...me. I much prefer the memories to the material things. And thank goodness I had a buffer like your big mean brother. Bless you sweet Lulu and your holy broken heart. And I sure would love to hear more cool/humorous/quirky things about your Mom and why you love her so.

Gretchen said...

I wish I knew what to say but I don't. I'd love to hear more about your mom in the upcoming weeks/months. The hole may never fully heal, but I hope it at least closes up a bit for you.